Monday, February 20, 2012

God and HIS ways

I have to start this post with a warning.  If you are squeemish in any way, do yourself a favor and don't read this.  It is a graphic portrayal of my week of puke.  It is graphic on purpose; I want to remember it that way because it was, in real life, graphic.  It was nasty, and gross, chunky, and just, well, puke. 

For those of you who know me well, you know I have a vomit phobia.  For those who don't know me as well, now you do.  I have a phobia of my children vomitting, of being the barfer myself, of strangers upchucking around me, etc.  It sends me into panic just thinking about it.  And there is no sarcasm in this at all.  It is a true phobia.  I have actually been labelled as OCD due to excessive hand washing because I am afraid of throwing up.  My kids know that the first thing they do when we come in from the car is get a stool and wash their hands.  But God, that darn God of mine, he is funny sometimes.  He isn't one to let us sit and be afraid of the unseen things such as viruses. 

Saturday Scott had to go to Statesboro for a math league competition.  As if that doesn't sound aweful in and of itself, (I hate math and busses, so to me that would be my idea of punishment for something gone awry), Scott woke up and said "My stomach is upset."  Well, Scott's stomach is always upset.  He has IBS, big whoop; needless to say I blew that little statement off.  So I was pretty surprised when he called me a couple hours later and told me that the bus dropped him off in MILLEN at a BP because he was sick.  He was sitting in a chair with his pillow and blanket next to the bathroom door.  Poor guy.  Fortunately for me, a friend of his picked him up because he doesn't have kids and knew it would be hard for me to get to Scott.  Of course I was going to do it, no questions asked, but I am so thankful someone else stepped up.  Unfortunately, Scott barfed all over Doug's car, so when they got home I donned my latex gloves and armed myself with some lysol wipes and cleaned up his car.  It was eggroll, by the way. 

Tuesday night Jordan crawled into bed with us.  When she does this it forces me out of bed due to space issues.  I came to the couch to sleep, but not before getting  a glass of water.  An hour later Jordan comes out to say something and before she could she just started to spew.  Lucky for me I had an empty glass to catch it with.  I then get out my barf bowl, get her comfy on the couch and me not so comfy on the floor and stay up with her all.night.long.  It was a rough one.  I gave her sips of water just so she would have something to throw up.  Both her eyes were bloodshot the next day due to popped capillaries.  Do you want me to be more descriptive?  Shall I go on?  Okay.  My pleasure.  Guess who is next.  Moi.  And of course, in true mom fashion, we either don't get it at all or we get it the worst. Well, I took the bullet.  After taking care of two sickies I get it the worst of all.  I am out of commission for two days.  In fact, I just ate my first meal last night.  THE VERY DAY I decide it may be safe to leave my bedroom JW gets it.  I cannot say this more literally, I open my door at the very same time that he opened his from taking a nap and I smelled it.  The timing couldn't have been more made for t.v.  It is an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond being lived out in my home.  We just dropped like flies one right after the other last week.  Then, to add insult to injury, mother nature makes a visit on Friday.  That week has been hell.  Nothing less than hell.  If I were not a believer, I imagine my hell would involve a never ending stomach bug.  And the laundry.  Oh the laundry!  I think I can dig myself out eventually, but it may take a while. 
Can you spot the dog?  Mollie enjoyed the soft cushy spot.  And trust me when I say that the entire house looks like this.  And this is just sick laudry; this doesn't include dirty stuff that a household of five just accumulates due to being alive.  One room at a time...one room at a time.  That will be my motto until the house is clean again.  Oh, and lysol spray.  I can't forget to go get some of that.  It will get done in time.  I am tired.  Tired to the bone.  I fell asleep in church, that is how tired I am.  Yet I am oddly proud of myself for making it through with minimal complaining, eyes fixed upon the cross knowing that this too shall pass, both figuratively and literally.

A couple things I learned, some more important than others:  One, latex gloves are a must as a mom.  Two, hardwood floors beat carpet any day, and a steam mop comes in handy on said floors.  Three, Snickers candy bars are the hardest thing ever to throw up.  Thought I was going to choke.  I couldn't get that thing up to save my life.  After that it was smooth barfing.  Fourth, iPhones are good for taking pics on the fly, but the pics themselves aren't so good.  I miss my camera!  Fifth, and by far the most important, I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. 

Friday, February 3, 2012

Um, Gross!

Jordan calls the phlem that one coughs up her "cough".  So the other day she said, "Mom, sometimes my cough tastes good so I chew it up and swallow it."  Um, okay.  Just don't eat your boogers, okay kid?  Or should I assume she already is?

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Long time, no type :)

It has been forever since I have been on here.  I am going to change that very soon.  But I just had to ype out a sweet moment for posterity sake.  Jordan has become a little liar.  I am not sure that she knows why it is wrong, but knows that it is a sin and that we as her mom and dad don't like it either.  But in church on Sunday she started writing her name on a prayer request card.  I asked her if she wanted the pastor to pray for something and explained that she would put it in the offering plate when it came by.  She wrote: "Please pray that God would help me to not lie."  Oh.my.goodness.  There is nothing more beautiful than seeing your child's young heart being molded by the best potter ever.  It is also a huge reminder that it is by grace we are saved.  I don't do my spiritual duty enough with the kids.  But God still works regardless.  It is by grace we are saved by faith, and this is not of yourselves!  Thank you to the apostle Paul for that gem. 

Yesterday JW drove me absolutely nuts.  I mean, he was in time out no less than 20 times.  At one point Micah scratched and/or hit and/or pushed him.  I sent her to timeout and made her say sorry to JW when she came back.  She did and he embraced her with a huge bear hug.  I smiled one of my few parenting smiles of the day, giggled a little, then hoped beyond all hope that JW didn't topple over on top of Micah.  Did I mention he is 39 inches now?   His doc says if he remains on his growth curve he will be close to 41 inches at his 3 year checkup.  Um, that is the size of a 4.5-5 year old.  Can we say "LINEBACKER!"  He is a big, huge, very much thinning out,  thick boy who has the coordination of a 15 month old haha!