The father of lies is at it again. Satan himself is spreading a vicious lie throughout families of multiples. The lie is so simple, yet we who are moms to these multiple blessings put way too much stock in it. The lie is this: it gets easier as they get older. IT IS A BIG FAT HONKIN' LIE!!! I have been waiting for 10 months now for things to ease up. I have waited patiently at times, and not so patiently for most of the time. I have put stock into the lie too, hoping there might be just some small grain of truth to it. But alas, just as he always does, Satan has deceived me. There are a few things that are proof that my life has not gotten easier. I, the lover of all things photography, have taken all of about 10 pictures of my kids in the last few weeks. This photo lover took a gazillion pictures of the the great snow of 2010, but I have yet to post a single one. It will be 90 degrees outside and you all will be viewing pictures of Jordan making snow angels. If that isn't enough proof for you then maybe this will do it: if you know me well, you know that I despise a messy house. More than a messy house, I despise a dirty nasty house. Well, needless to say, I have turned a blind eye to my own home. I have plain given up on keeping this house even remotely pleasant; I have become but a shell of my former self. So if you are wondering why I haven't been in the blogosphere lately, it is because I am either under a pile of laundry, under a pile of dishes, or under a pile of kids.
Though I am getting more sleep than I was during the newborn stage, I am tired. I am oh so very tired. I really want to take a vacation and sleep the entire time. Forget about sight seeing or doing fun things like parasailing, I just want a bed and room service. Oh Satan, I hate you! You are making me think that sleep and room service are what I need! What I really need is to embrace Isaiah 30:15 "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength." God, give me grace to make it through this. In my exhaustion, I am not even really sure how that verse relates to what I am going through right now. Seriously! I just know that God brought it to mind, and when God brings a verse to mind, you type it. I am sure He will explain it all later...when my mind has the ability to comprehend what he is trying to teach me. At this rate I am thinking the time of comprehension will be on the other side of heaven.
On a slightly different note, when talking to a friend this weekend I swore I would never ever do twins/two babies at once ever again. Once is enough! I am so blessed and love my babies, but ONCE IS ENOUGH :) You know what she said? She said "Never say never." How dare she! She even had the nerve to say something along the lines of "If it is what God brings you, how could you say no?" (Geez, Cary. Did you have to go and say that?) God, please oh please do not pull a very cruel joke and make me eat my words haha. I type that only half joking...
I hope that you my reader can sense both the sarcasm and seriousness of this post. I am very serious when I say how tired I am. I am very serious when I say once is enough. I am also very serious about my lack of mental abilities right now. I think the rest is sarcastic, although right now I am too tired to know for sure ;)
3 comments:
Oh friend...hang in there. You're right. It doesn't get easier...you just enter a new kind of hard. God is sufficient. He will sometimes only give you the strength you need even when you're begging for a surplus of get-up-and-go. I wish I were closer. I'd take those babies for a day or two...
Keep trusting in God to give you the strength you need. Having twin babies is so physically taxing. That will get better eventually. There will be different challenges that come along, but I have found that the mental/emotional challenges that have come with twin toddlers/preschoolers is much easier to deal with when I've had some sleep. Hang in there! :)
I can't even tell you how many times I have told God that I am VERY thankful for my first set of twins but that I'd appreciate not being blessed in the same way again. :)
shannon! although i dont have twins i can tell you that we've just recently turned a corner into things being a "bit" easier. Abraham is 21 months now and maggie 3 1/2....with them being so close together for about a year i thought it was too much. but now, they play together (and fight!) but i dont worry about abe putting things in his mouth or breaking a leg. i think when they turn 15 months things will start getting easier. promise!
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